A hysterical story!

Ok I received this in an email from one of my teachers the other day and HAD to share! This was extra funny since I am 27 weeks pregnant at the moment!

It didn't have any source, so I was unable to state the source. This story was not deveopled by me. I dare you not to laugh though!

The 'Middle Wife'
by an Anonymous 2nd grade teacher

I've been teaching now for about fifteen years. I have two kids myself, but the best birth story I know is the one I saw in my own second grade classroom a few years back.

When I was a kid, I loved Show-and-Tell. So I always have a few sessions with my students. It helps them get over shyness and usually, Show-and-Tell is pretty tame. Kids bring in pet turtles, model airplanes, pictures of fish they catch, stuff like that. And I never, ever place any boundaries or limitations on them. If they want to lug it in to school and talk about it, they're welcome.

Well, one day this little girl, Erica, a very bright, very outgoing kid, takes her turn and waddles up to the front of the class with a pillow stuffed under her sweater.

She holds up a snapshot of an infant. 'This is Luke, my baby brother, and I'm going to tell you about his birthday.'

'First, Mom and Dad made him as a symbol of their love, and then Dad put a seed in my Mom's stomach, and Luke grew in there. He ate for nine months through an umbrella cord.'

She's standing there with her hands on the pillow, and I'm trying not to laugh and wishing I had my camcorder with me. The kids are watching her in amazement.

'Then, about two Saturdays ago, my Mom starts going, 'Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh!' Erica puts a hand behind her back and groans. 'She walked around the house for, like an hour, 'Oh, oh, oh!' (Now this kid is doing a hysterical duck walk and groaning.)

'My Dad called the middle wife. She delivers babies, but she doesn't have a sign on the car like the Domino's man. They got my Mom to lie down in bed like this.' (Then Erica lies down with her back against the wall.)

'And then, pop! My Mom had this bag of water she kept in there in case he got thirsty, and it just blew up and spilled all over the bed, like psshhheew!' (This kid has her legs spread with her little hands miming water flowing away. It was too much!)

'Then the middle wife starts saying 'push, push,' and 'breathe, breathe.
They started counting, but never even got past ten. Then, all of a sudden, out comes my brother. He was covered in yucky stuff that they all said it was from Mom's play-center, so there must be a lot of toys inside there. When he got out, the middle wife spanked him for crawling up in there in the first place.'

Then Erica stood up, took a big theatrical bow and returned to her seat.

I'm sure I applauded the loudest. Ever since then, when it's Show-and Tell Day, I bring my camcorder, just in case another 'Middle Wife' comes along.

Live every day as if it is your LAST chance to make someone laugh.

Wacky Wednesday

My husband and I's favorite place to go to the movies was damaged in the tornado last monday. We go every once in a while when we have some extra funds for the month. Seriously- it is SO expensive to go to the movies now. I am now a huge fan of redbox, netflix and Itunes purchased movies =) Anyways this made my laugh when I saw it and Have a great wednesday!  

Wacky Wednesday

I am sure some of my students would think this is true =D

Happy Wednesday Everyone!

Wacky Wednesday

I wish my productivity self would have more of a humorous side =D 

So TRUE I LOVE being an SLP!

Happy Wednesday!

Wacky Wednesday

Today my wacky wednesday comes from the "science nerd" in me haha. 

Ya pretty much.........

(I found this from iwastesomuchtime.com from a pinterest link)

Thanks for stopping by!

Wacky Wednesday

This sounds like many of my students that I serve that are on the Autism Spectrum! haha! 

I hope you have a good laugh from this one- Amy @ Major Speech

Wacky Wednesday

HaHa I don't drink coffee and I don't like chocolate- but MANY women do so this made me laugh out loud and I knew I had to share! I love the medical terminology too!

Wacky Wednesday

Hahaha this made my grammar correcting self laugh out loud!

Wacky Wednesday

Enough said! Happy Wednesday!

Wacky Wednesday

.....said no elementary kid ever! Happy Wednesday!

Wacky Wednesday

Some of my students get this face a lot! Happy Wednesday!

Wacky Wednesday

hahahahaha This made me laugh out loud!

Wacky Wednesday

                                

This is true: I love making things on Pinterest, but only when I have enough time =) This is extra funny around my area because Sweet Brown was from Oklahoma City, OK (where I live). So this totally made me laugh out loud pretty hard! If you have not seen the Sweet Brown video, check it out below. She made national news and there are many You Tube variations of this video of her. She now has more money that I do from all of the attention.

This happened in my hometown. The situation is NOT funny, but this video went viral all over the nation and this is where the picture above gets its humor. My husband is a volunteer fire fighter, so I understand the gravity of being thankful for getting out of a burning building. BUT really! The news seems to find the strangest people to interview for news reports!

Wacky Wednesday

                                      

Anyone have an experience like this with a student, teacher, school psychologist, or parent? I overall have had pretty good luck, but every once in a while I have one of these =) I am an overall very positive person, so I always try to find the positive side to things =) Things are never THAT bad!

Wacky Wednesday

is this a new phrase for Figurative Language??? 

Wacky Wednesday

This made me laugh out loud when I came across it on Pinterest. 

This joke did remind me of some of the things I learned in graduate school not too long ago. I will use this moment to do some cultural diversity education.

There is a phonological process for this called metathesis and it is typical in the African American English dialect. I remember learning that in graduate school from my amazing teacher Dr. Buckingham-- we had to do an end of the year presentation and I completed my presentation on the phonological processes of the African American English dialect. It was very interesting and as most of you speech path's know- we don't treat phonological processes if they are a part of the dialect of english that is spoken at home or in the community culture. Now if it is affecting how a student is being graded during oral assignments and such at school- then it can be addressed and you would do therapy and educate the student that there are multiple "registers" in which language is used. There is a formal register and an informal register. The formal register would be school, where the standard english dialect (SAE) is appropriate, the informal register is at home where the african american dialect (AAE) is appropriate. I am a HUGE proponent of cultural diversity and I encourage all of you to learn about the various dialects of english and how they might differ from standard american english.  It will make you a better clinician!

Wacky Wednesday

Yup, GUILTY!